What it Takes to Make it Last

The thought that one day we'll meet someone in our lives worth keeping is what often keeps us searching for true love. A love that is endless and unconditional. A love that can withstand anything. A love that makes all of those past loves seem worth it because they led you to this final love.

Now in finding true love there is this crazy misconception that after you get together with this person everything will go smoothly. Like most things in life, it's just not that simple. There will be good times, there will be bad times and it's up to you both to make it work. What a lot of us lack in relationships seems to be communication. We don't know how to sit down and have a proper discussion without it turning into an argument. Now I'm not saying that there won't be arguments, because really no matter how close two people are there will be disagreements. What I am saying is that learning the proper way to communicate can make that love worth keeping.

On the other hand, we also lack listening skills, and I don't mean that in one ear and out the other kind of listening. You have to hear what they are saying and comprehend it because if you don't that is just as bad as not communicating at all. 

Communication and listening go hand in hand to make a relationship work. No more pointing the finger or going to bed mad. Sit down and have a true heart to heart conversation. Those can make or break your relationship. I mean you never know your current love could in fact be your last love. 

T. Neal | Cambridge, MD

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Disclaimer: Fenix Youth Project Inc. supports young writers and their voices and providing them with a platform to submit think pieces, poetry, short stories, and also reflect on experiences and program events. All blog posts are reviewed by the Executive Director, Amber Green. Blog posts are the opinions and reflections of writers and do not represent the organization as a whole. Questions and comments can be emailed to ambergreen@fenixyouthproject.org.

Self-love - The Love That Starts With You

Self-love, one of the purest forms of love but in my opinion, it is also one of the most underrated. Now I'm not saying underrated because not everyone loves themselves, but I'm saying underrated because we often take for granted just what self-love can do for us. 

We often hear that to truly find someone to love and to love that person back, we must first love ourselves. To some degree, I can agree with that, but in the same breath, it feels like when this is said then you are also saying that someone is not worthy of being loved because they don't love themselves. I don't like that, because you can truly love someone even if you're not completely in love with yourself. Now if it's true love, which I hope we can get into some other time, then that person will help you to love and cherish every part of yourself that you didn't once love. 

Now loving others aside, self-love can open a whole lot of other avenues for you in life. It can bring you the confidence to be unapologetically you, and that means standing behind everything that you say or do. That means never letting anyone discourage you from doing what you love or being who you are. Self-love leads you in the direction of knowing your worth, and never, ever accepting anything less. 

Those two things are only the beginning of what self-love has in store for you, it also leads to healing all of the hurt inside of you. 

While I can tell you all about the benefits of self-love, I can't tell you how to love yourself or how to heal from the things you don't want to talk about. What I will tell you is that it is the beginning of an unexplainable peace, and once you begin to find that peace, I pray that you never lose it. 

Just remember self-love, starts with self-care. So, don't forget to take that time for yourself. After reading this, I would like for you to sit in front of a mirror with a sheet of paper and list at a minimum of five things that you truly love about yourself. Then as yourself how easy was that. We all need to work on self-love, and I swear the more you love about yourself the easier this list is to create because the list will just go on and on. 

T. Neal | Cambridge, MD

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Disclaimer: Fenix Youth Project Inc. supports young writers and their voices and providing them with a platform to submit think pieces, poetry, short stories, and also reflect on experiences and program events. All blog posts are reviewed by the Executive Director, Amber Green. Blog posts are the opinions and reflections of writers and do not represent the organization as a whole. Questions and comments can be emailed to ambergreen@fenixyouthproject.org.

Step Out of Your Comfort Zone

The comfort zone, really the most dangerous zone I've ever been in. It may seem like the perfect place for you, but while there it leaves no room for change in your life. Everything that happens in that zone feels so right because you're so used to it. The good, the bad, and everything in between you accept it. 

One day, hopefully after reading this, you'll question why you became so stagnant. What put you here? Why have you accepted everything that comes with this comfort zone? When those questions come, you'll most likely have to be brutally honest with yourself. Yeah, I know the truths that we avoid seem to hurt but they bring that push we need to step out of that zone that has left us stagnant in life. 

One of the first answers you'll probably come up with is that you're scared. Oh, how fear runs a lot of our lives, especially fear of the future and what's to come. We don't know what will happen once we step out of our comfort zone, the future is one thing that is not easy to predict. Even though that may scare you, I want you to remember that to have even gotten into this comfort zone you had to at some point step out of your previous comfort zone. You did it once, and I know that it can happen again. 

So, after reading this I want you to embrace the uncertainty of the future. Do things that you never thought you'd do. Mostly I want you to follow your heart's desires, and then when you look back, you'll wonder why you were so scared in the first place. Embrace the change that is stepping out of your comfort zone. 

T. Neal | Cambridge, MD

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Disclaimer: Fenix Youth Project Inc. supports young writers and their voices and providing them with a platform to submit think pieces, poetry, short stories, and also reflect on experiences and program events. All blog posts are reviewed by the Executive Director, Amber Green. Blog posts are the opinions and reflections of writers and do not represent the organization as a whole. Questions and comments can be emailed to ambergreen@fenixyouthproject.org.